Do One Thing A Day That Scares You

I learned to snowboard on the mostly man-made white hills of Big Bear in Southern California. We had GREAT days up there but they pretty much never included powder. As a recent transplant to Colorado, now I've been blessed with a few opportunities to experience the elusive stuff. So this past weekend while my love was laid up with a bad cold, I ventured alone up into the high country for a bonafide SNOW DAY. Not those gorgeous marketing shots where it's just dumped a foot of pow but it's a brilliant sunny day, I'm talking a day where snow was actively falling and it was pretty much a white out, your neck gaiter is frozen solid and you're being continually pelted about the face with snow daggers.

Not this.

More like this.

And my companions are a threesome of expert level skiers. Like the kind that raced in college. I can hold my own but in an effort to dodge the tourist contingent, these pow hounds took me directly to the back bowls of Vail for some first tracks in powder. On a white out day. First run of the day was to a run called "Seldom", which, btw, is right next to "Never" which should tell you something about this area. On a snowboard I couldn't quite make the loooong ridge trail catwalk over to Seldom with them so I dropped in alone on a run called "Ricky's Ridge" as they disappeared into the distance. In a moment I was completely alone and couldn't see 2 feet in front of me. I'd never been on this run so don't know what it looks or feels like on a clear day. I'm up to my shins in heavy powder with a layer of ice beneath it and I mean I was ALONE. I couldn't see or hear a person in any direction. And each time I moved I felt like I was being magnetically pulled into a crevasse or something, I kept getting stuck and was making no progress. I wiped out badly twice and cleaned my clock both times. And then I started to get scared. Like skerrrrred that I wouldn't be able to get down to whatever the hell chairlift was down there. I caught my toeside edge, fell again and landed on my knees with my board buried deeply and still attached behind me. It's hard to feel any stupider than this. I couldn't flip over it backwards because of the snow, couldn't go sideways unless I no longer want use of my knees so my only option was to somersault forward, down the hill?!? Fuuuuck.

Right in the middle of it, I somehow remembered the Lululemon credo "Do Something Once A Day That Scares You". And that made me laugh out loud up there on Ricky's Ridge. I've always been a fan of that advice and try to teach it by example. But in that moment I realized, I must usually push up against that edge by doing things that I'm scared of looking stupid doing. Maybe I never actually get to the level of shit-my-pants-scared for my wellbeing! This observation kicked my yoga practice into gear and I recalled that fear is just an expression of energy and I could actually transmute that energy into something more productive if I could just assimilate it and stay on the board!!

So I fully acknowledged my fear by recognizing what it was doing to my physical body and observed how dramatic one's mind can be - to the point of absurdity. People go down this run every day of the season damnit!! So I pointed that nose down and knew if I just kept going down, whatever that looked like, I'd either find a chairlift and my friends or a nice family of bears hibernating for the winter who might make some space for me. And soon Ricky's spirit had mercy on me and I could see again and there I was barreling towards the chairlift with an apologetic smile and a juicy round of expletives.

Damn you, Ricky Andenmatten

I simultaneously hated and loved that experience. From one perspective, it was the kinda shameful blemish on an otherwise magnificent day. But from another perspective, it was the highlight of the day for giving me the chance to re-evaluate what I'm made of. The guru is everywhere y'all, when you're willing to receive the teaching.

Facing something that scares you everyday trains up your ability to have the grace to shift your perspective and transmute the immense power of fear into immense appreciation for life and all the opportunities it provides for us to learn, expand and evolve into extraordinary. Get out there and get skerred!!

PS- No pants were harmed nor shit in for the purposes of this blog post.